Monday, September 29, 2014

on my wishlist

among endless wishlists for when i'll be working in styling or photography (i still have hopes and dreams, hey!), i made this one: the beautifully patterned rachel comey legend sweatshirt, in ivory, the simple isabel marant short tube necklace in silver, aesop's super rosehip seed lip cream, the gorgeous loop earring from kathleen whitaker, how cool it is (!), isabel marant étoile crisi boots in black suede, aesop's nurturing conditioner that my fragile hair needs badly these days, the pearly pretty emma deux ear cuff by sophie bille brahe and finally the perfect ombré sweatshirt from proenza schouler.
all items are available on la garç, where of course you can lose your heart and mind so so easily.

Monday, September 22, 2014

september and being alive

i really feel like i've been away so much. like a year or so. i wish to do so many things, yet i feel there is not enough time. i've written a blog post few days ago but i haven't had the courage to press the publish button, perhaps feels too personal, yet if i'm not that way here, where it's my space, then where could i be, right? oh, so many in my head. i always wonder if other people get so fussy and mixed up or perhaps i have too much free time and someone should give me a kick, haha.
i love my morning/sometimes afternoons breakfast, the roses grandma handpicked for me from her beautiful big garden, trying new types of tea, i really wish i could have my own kitchen to make my shelf full of boxes with tea, i love how poetic and pretty everything feels about flowers, the corners of their petals, how i could take 21 photos of every inch of them, how their leaves look in a white background, i even love how their stem looks through a vase with clear water, how divine are the shape of the rose petals, like they've been painted with an exquisite hand, just stare at them closely for a while, you'll see.
i love the shape of collar bones and i hope mine will be more pronounced soon, the scent of my new vanilla body butter on my skin, it would be equally divine on his shoulders too, i'm sure.
i love that i finished eckhart tolle's book full of wisdom and light and i'm hungry for another book of his too.
i love many things this september and it's autumn and it's raining between these mountains and i hope to take more photographs and i wish i could make a photobook or an exhibit, something real.
i wish to be lighter and even more alive.

Saturday, September 20, 2014

gentle and kind

a lot, a lot in the head, the joy of the apples from grandma's yard, the joy of the strawberries found in the farmer's market, the joy that i still feel a lot, that i can still be gentle, kind, my favourite feelings, you know. ah, how time flies. so fast! it was like yesterday that i was on a train, that the first of september caught me full of emotions on the streets of bucharest, i didn't find my place in all the noise, yet deep inside i found details and pieces of the quietness and serenity among those old buildings, those books and libraries with chairs that now feel like they're calling me back or am i just dreaming, the joy of good food and i wish i could have them all without feeling guilty, the joy that i can wear now a white or black simple t-shirt with my new faux leather jacket or long cardigan cause it's autumn, the sun on my imperfect face, in the back of my not yet good enough bones and skin, the hunger that i have to get back to life, to recover myself, the hunger for kindness to your shoulders, to your round eyes, to the chin that could stretch into my breasts and feel like home, the desire i still have to build a place of my own, to shake the dust and buy new chinaware and teacups and spoons and musli crunch and yogurt and make you bowls with icecream and light up a vanilla candle, use the new coconut body cream after a warm bath and breathe in its scent, all the magazines we have to read and all the light that we have to inspire us today and tomorrow.

all these are waiting, happening.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

still there

in the past weeks i haven't had the drive to take photographs with the camera, other than the iPhone, even if deep inside i still feel how dear it is to me the act itself and i have in my head all these projects and ideas and desires and they keep twisting and turning and i never get to sort them out and let them come to light.
it's probably my bad and i should shake my shoulders and twist my hair and figure things out, right?
cause on the other hand i feel so grateful for small details such as receiving e-mail from VSCOteam saying they picked one photo to be officially part of the curated VSCOgrid.
oh, wait, i re-checked my e-mails and there is another photo selected. imagine my inside now ^.^.
it's not something huge for most people, but it's these sort of moments that make your heart lighter and it tells you that you are doing something pretty, there, in some amount.
so until i can finish sorting things out, there is some light, if anybody happens to need some, on my VSCOgrid or instagram.

Saturday, August 9, 2014

some days

some days you just feel like everything is falling apart, that you're all alone in your fights and you're the only one that can lift you up again on the light path.
some days you just feel that ache in your chest covered in lace and you wish you could ripe it out with your bare hands, those with whom you wish you would touch something more beautiful.
some days you just wish you could allow yourself to be weak.
some days you just wish there could be someone willing to love you imperfect as you are, weak as you are, dreamy as you are, knowing you light up again soon, knowing there is something good there inside.
some days come, some days go, i know.
where are you, where am i ?